SET-WAY MANUAL
SET-T + GATEWAY CONSCIOUSNESS TRAINING FOR NON-CIVILIAN ELITE INTELLIGENCE DEFENCE SECURITY & LAW ENFORCEMENT PERSONNEL
STRATEGIC INTELLIGENCE TRAINING
GATEWAY TO CONSCIOUS SELF EMPOWERMENT
(Civilian Version)
The best kept secret for almost half a century!
Ready to reset your mind?
Gateway to Conscious Self Empowerment blends modern neuroscience, emotional
regulation, and expanded awareness to help you balance, align, and grow across
every life domain. Think better. Feel better. Live better.
A contemporary neuroscience
and evidence based evolution of the Gateway framework, integrated with Self
Empowerment Theory (SET‑T). Attentional regulation, interoceptive
mapping, emotional coherence, micro strategies, self differentiation, self
regulation, self transcendence and expanded awareness brought together
in one practical manual for clinicians, leaders, first responders, executives
and high performers. Transform your self discrepancies. Strengthen
resilience. Elevate every life domain.
Adapted from the Monroe
Institute’s Gateway Intermediate Workbook (1977), declassified by the CIA
(2003). Modernized and reframed using contemporary scientific principles.
Raising Giants
The ABC of Connected Parenting for Unshakable Resilience
By Prof. David Kaye
Imagine standing on the shoulders of giants, not distant
historical figures, but the quiet, everyday parents who once carried us through
storms we barely remember. Now, it's our turn. But the world has shifted. The
old scripts of control and punishment no longer hold. In their place rises a
revolutionary path: connected parenting fused with the science of trainable
resilience.
This isn't a quick fix or a soft surrender. Connected parenting is
a profound, lifelong commitment, a deliberate cultivation of emotional depth,
unbreakable trust, and the kind of inner strength that turns adversity into
fuel for growth. Grounded in Professor David Kaye's Universal Law of
Psychological Resilience and the Self-Empowerment Model (pioneered
through decades of clinical work at the Australian Trauma Research Institute
and The Resilience Institute, with applications across over 6,000+ cases of
trauma, anxiety, depression, and more), this approach marries empathy with
empowerment.
Resilience, according to this breakthrough framework, is not
an inherited gift or fixed trait. It is considered a malleable state anyone can
build. Through four powerful pillars, self-awareness, self-differentiation,
self-regulation, and self-transcendence, parents become
architects of their children's (and their own) psychological fortress. The result?
Children who don't just survive challenges, they thrive through them, emerging
stronger, more purposeful, and deeply connected.
Parenting today is both the hardest and most sacred work we do.
Yesterday's methods, rooted in fear and force, offered short-term compliance at
the cost of long term emotional scars. Amid today's epidemic of anxiety,
depression, and trauma, connected parenting answers with something radical: connection
over control, understanding over obedience and empathy over
punishment.
The DARP Society: Rotten to the Core & the Cure
In an era marked by escalating crimes against humanity, international lawlessness, institutional misconduct, health and educational inequity, workplace based power struggles and interpersonal abuse, perpetrators increasingly deploy sophisticated deflection strategies to maintain power and evade culpability.
Building on this, Professor David Kaye adapts and expands the concept to DARP (Deny, Attack, Reverse Victim and Abuser, Project and Persist).
DARP incorporates projection of the abuser’s toxicity onto the victim and unrelenting persistence, rendering it particularly insidious in modern toxic cultures, including workplaces, families, legal systems, government institutions, organisations and regimes.
Professor Kaye introduces tried and tested Self Empowerment strategies to counter this local, national and global scourge.
This book is about empowering individuals to become intrinsically resilient. Psychological resilience is the dynamic, adaptive process of maintaining or restoring intrapersonal psychological stability and integrity in the face of adversity and is achieved through the integration of self awareness, self differentiation, self regulation and self transcendence, as articulated in Self Empowerment Theory pioneered by Professor David Sarikaya
This law posits that resilience is not a fixed trait but a malleable state that can be cultivated through intentional practices and interventions. Self Empowerment Theory and its clinical application, Self Empowerment Therapy and Single Session Self Empowerment Therapy evolved through the clinical application of the therapy with over 6000 patients from a cohort suffering from PTSD, acute grief, loss, addictions, anxiety and depression. The theory is based on four core assumptions:
1. Individuals know themselves better than anybody else.
2. Individuals are not
disturbed by things but by their powerlessness to change them.
3. Individuals don’t have a multitude of problems in their lives but a
problem pattern that permeates their life domains in counterproductive,
pathological and predictable ways.
4. The unique problem pattern that permeates the life domains has
exponential and cumulative features and emerges as the personality evolves,
especially in the formative and developmentally sensitive transition periods
from childhood to adolescence and adolescence to adulthood and is the byproduct
of skills deficits and an inability to reconcile discrepancies within the self,
leading to significant disintegration between actual, ought, ideal and
undesirable components of the self.
This book covers a comprehensive 18 week course in counseling and offers a step by step guide for clinicians and aspiring counselors who wish to learn the intricate and essential skills to become an effective professional counselor.
Effective training and competent
postgraduate and ongoing supervision for counselors is paramount in ensuring the provision
of high-quality mental health care, both for the counselor and their prospective
clients. As individuals, couples and families grapple with an array of challenges in their lives,
from personal crises to mental health issues, the role of counselors becomes
increasingly vital.
Professor David Sarikaya MAPA ACS, who is the pioneer of Self Empowerment Theory and its clinical application, Self Empowerment Therapy, is a
prominent figure in the field of counseling psychology with over three decades of clinical experience in assessing and managing the broad spectrum of psychological disorders and emphasizes the
significance of ongoing education and training for professionals to adapt to
the dynamic nature of psychological therapy. Additionally, the incorporation of
innovative therapeutic approaches, such as Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT), Solution Focused Therapy (SFT) and Self Empowerment Therapy (SET), further underscores the
importance of staying abreast of evolving practices in the field.
It is important to highlight the
necessity of ongoing education and training for counselors. The dynamic nature
of psychological therapy demands a commitment to lifelong learning. Continuous
training not only helps counselors refine their existing skills but also
enables them to stay informed about the latest developments in the field. As
mental health understanding evolves, staying current ensures that counselors
can provide clients with the most effective and evidence-based interventions.
Review by Dr. Bob Rich Senior Psychologist (Retired)
The Allure of Workaholism: Unraveling the Hidden Mental Health
Consequences
In today's fast-paced world, the notion of success often
revolves around relentless dedication to work. The relentless pursuit of professional
achievement and the desire to excel have given birth to a new breed of
individuals known as workaholics. Workaholism, though seemingly virtuous, comes
at a cost, taking a heavy toll on both physical and mental well-being. This book will explore the consequences of workaholism on mental health.
Workaholism initially appears as a positive attribute, as it
signifies an individual's dedication and commitment to their career. Being
regarded as an exemplary worker and constantly striving for perfection can
bestow a sense of accomplishment and respect. However, this façade of success
often conceals the detrimental consequences that accompany excessive work
devotion.
Certain professionals are more vulnerable to workaholism due to various factors associated with their often conflictual career demands, work culture, and personal characteristics such as tenacity, resilience and functional integrity of their personality domains or lack thereof. This book explores the pitfalls and the solutions to create a workable work-life balance.
A Compelling Hypothesis: Does Mental
Illness Exist?
The Compelling Hypothesis advocates
a novel and comprehensive, yet practical approach to mental health and
proposes that there is no such thing as mental illness and that the “mental
illness” shroud is indeed a protective mechanism that individuals use to
protect themselves and society ascribes to protect itself from the so
labeled.
The hypothesis instead advances the
notion that “mental illness” exists as a construct for the benefit of doctors,
psychiatrists, psychologists, social workers, lawyers, the judiciary, the
various governments and interest groups and a vast industry of “professionals”
via a special language communicated and controlled by such devices as the DSM
and ICD etc. in symbiosis with vulnerable members of society by labeling them as
mentally ill.
Clearly this does not make the case
for the contra arguments or the Fix. Bernard Shaw in The Doctor’s Dilemma shed
some light on the issue of professional privilege but views expressed are based
on cumulative data after 35 years of clinical practice and research which
culminated in the development of a novel strategic mode of intervention for mental
wealth, Self Empowerment Therapy, at the epicenter of which is the “Self”, it’s
differentiation and evolution as it relates to intra and interpersonal
dynamics.
Self Empowerment Theory which is based on research
into ”Self Discrepancies” was pioneered by Professor David Sarikaya to address the
shortcomings of behavioral and cognitive therapies and to empower disadvantaged
people unable to access therapy due to cost and the time it usually takes to
attend and benefit from life changing therapy.
The therapy is simple, evidence based, user friendly and anchored on
four core assumptions:
1. We know ourselves better than anybody else.
2.
3. We don’t have a multitude of
problems in our lives but a problem pattern that permeates our life domains in
counterproductive, pathological and predictable ways.
4. The unique problem pattern
that permeates our life domains has exponential and cumulative features and
emerges as our personality evolves, especially in the formative and
developmentally sensitive transition periods from
childhood to adolescence and adolescence to adulthood and is the biproduct of
skills deficits and our inability to reconcile discrepancies within the
self.
Therefore, Self Empowerment Theory dictates
that as well as uncovering the problem pattern permeating our life domains, we
need to adopt cognitive and lifestyle restructuring micro- strategies to
regulate the discrepancies between various components of our self to create an
integrated, functioning, resilient, desirable and productive self.
Blame Gabriel: Acute Grief Following Death of a Loved One
Some losses once borne can never be undone. Death of a
loved one is one such loss. In fact, death of a spouse is one of the most
distressing and disruptive challenges of ordinary life. It forces us to
confront our own mortality and the transience of life. It renders us so
powerless that there is nothing anyone can do to bring back the loved one.
Spirituality is an anchor of life, a fountain of
comfort and inner wealth and important for mental health.
Faith is about surrendering yourself. Christians,
Muslims, Jews, Hindus, Buddhists and even atheists surrender themselves, albeit
in different ways. There is a profoundly anchoring belief in Islam which is
usually recited after a death and a version of it exists in other Faiths:
“Inna lillahi wa inna ilayhi raji'un”; “We belong to
God and to God do we return”.
“Inna lillahi wa Inna ilayhi raji’un” is not just said
at the death of a person. Nabi sallalahu alaihe wa sallam used to say this
whenever he suffered any hardship. Perhaps a similar reminder of “the cycle of
life” after every adverse event may take the energy out of despair,
hopelessness and self destructive tendencies.
Self Empowerment Therapy provides an innovative
research based approach in managing acute grief following the death of a
loved one in circumstances of significant and life changing emotional distress
and turmoil.
The Five Minute Therapist
How
many times have you reached the point of no return, in the face of seemingly
increasing difficulties, frustration, confusion, things getting out of control,
and asked the question: “What do I do? The Five Minute Therapist’s response to
this question is consistently: Think about, plan or do something each day to
improve your life domains by investing an equal amount of time and energy in all
the life domains. These are: your Health (physical, psychological spiritual and sexual health), Family, Relationships, Profession, Education, Finances and Self.
Why are humans capable of loving and hating the same person at the same time?
This classic love-hate tango, is as human as
it gets, and psychology has a name for it: “Affective ambivalence”, where your
heart and brain decide to throw a simultaneous pity party and celebration for
the same person. This isn't some glitch; it's wired into how we process intense
deep vested emotions, especially in close relationships where someone can make
you feel on top of the world one minute and ready to chuck your phone across
the room the next.
At its core, we can love and hate the same
person because emotions aren't binary switches, they're on a messy spectrum,
and love/hate are more like passionate neighbors than opposites (the real
opposite of love is indifference). Psychologically, it boils down to this: In
deep attachments and bonds like romance or family, you invest so much
emotionally that you're hyper aware of the full package, their kindness that
melts you, but also their flaws that grate, like chronic lateness or emotional
unavailability. That vulnerability amps up the stakes; you sacrifice freedom
for intimacy, which can sometimes breed intense resentment when things feel
unbalanced, like unreciprocated effort hitting your self esteem. Suddenly, the
same traits that once charmed you (say, their spontaneity) now trigger hate
because they've crossed into chaos territory. It's not a contradiction, it's
just your brain juggling conflicting evaluations of the same complex human.
Neurologically, it's even cooler (or more
chaotic): Love and hate light up overlapping brain regions, like the insular
cortex, which cranks up the intensity of strong feelings without caring if
they're positive or negative. A 2008 study scanned 17 folks viewing photos of
people they adored or despised and found this shared wiring lets arousal
flip-flop fast, like how a thrilling argument can spark makeup passion or a
total blow up. Evolutionarily, this might've helped our ancestors stick with
flawed but vital partners for survival, turning potential deal breakers into
"I can't quit you" drama.
The kicker? This ambivalence creates emotional
dissonance or indecision due to an inability to decide based on the conflict
between your own priorities and those of loved ones, like to stay or to ghost.
But it's adaptive too: It forces reflection, helping you weigh what's worth salvaging.
If it's constant and soul crushing, though, it might signal deeper issues like
bonding and attachment or burnout issues. Otherwise, embrace the mess; it's
proof you're feeling deeply, not halfway.
References
Kaye,
D., (2002) Crossroads: Your Journey Within. Melbourne Books. Melbourne.
Zeki,
S and Romaya, J.P., (2008) Neural Correlates of Hate. University
College London. PLoS ONE (volume 3, issue 10, article e3556) 29/10/2008. DOI:
10.1371/journal.pone.0003556.
Love and Hate
You kiss me soft, then
slam the door.
I know your hands, I know that war.
You pull me close, then test my nerve.
One little smile, one cruel curve.
I keep the score, you
break the scale.
My chest says stay, my mind says bail.
Kindness hits first, then comes the sting.
Same sacred face, same damaged thing.
Love and hate, in the
same breath.
Love and hate, I can’t decide yet.
Love and hate, that’s my whole name.
Love and hate, for the same flame.
You’re late again, I
bite my tongue.
You say one true, I’m undone.
You know my wounds, you press the scene.
Then bring me back, like a fever dream.
I want your light, I
fear your fire.
You lift me up, then wire my wires.
That’s the trick, that’s the aim.
One heart split, at the same stage.
Love and hate, in the
same breath.
Love and hate, I can’t decide yet.
Love and hate, that’s my whole name.
Love and hate, for the same flame.
The brain keeps time,
with a broken drum.
The heart says go, the pride says run.
Some call it mess, some call it truth.
I call it you, I call it proof.
Love and hate, in the
same breath.
Love and hate, I can’t decide yet.
Love and hate, that’s my whole name.
Love and hate, for the same flame.
Love and hate, I’m
wired this way.
Love and hate, won’t fade away.
This song is available for purchase.
Rise
From the Ashes ©
By Prof. David Sarikaya
(A Ballad of Self Empowerment)
I
was born in shadows, caught in the storm,
A soul misunderstood, no place to belong.
The world said I’d stumble, that I’d never rise,
But deep in my heart, I always knew otherwise.
They
tried to break me, shake me, steal my voice,
But I stood my ground, made my own choice.
I’ll walk through the fire, with my head held high,
For I am the answer, and I’ll never deny.
I
rise from the ashes, I break through the chains,
I’m the one who decides, I’m the one who remains.
Against every dark whisper, against every lie,
I’ll stand on the mountain and touch the sky.
For in me is the strength from the blood in my veins,
I’ll rise from the ashes and wash all the stains.
The
road was not easy, the path was unclear,
But each step I took, I conquered my fear.
The voices of doubt tried to drag me down,
But I wore my courage like a King wears his crown.
I’ve
weathered the storm, I’ve felt the cold stings,
But I know that my heart is the source of my wings.
So when they say "You can’t," I’ll say, "I will,"
For I am the storm, and I bend the world still.
I
rise from the ashes, I break through the chains,
I’m the one who decides, I’m the one who remains.
Against every dark whisper, against every lie,
I’ll stand on the mountain and touch the sky.
For in me is the strength from the blood in my veins,
I’ll rise from the ashes and wash all the stains.
The
weight of the world can fall at my feet,
But I'll never back down, I’ll never retreat.
For the power I’ve found is a fire within,
A force of nature, a will that won’t bend.
Through
trials and shadows, through pain and through loss,
I’ve learned to see beauty in what others call "flaws."
The road may be long, but my soul knows the way,
For I am my hero, and I lead every day.
I
rise from the ashes, I break through the chains,
I’m the one who decides, I’m the one who remains.
Against every dark whisper, against every lie,
I’ll stand on the mountain and touch the sky.
For in me is the strength from the blood in my veins,
I’ll rise from the ashes and wash all the stains.
So
if the world tries to tell you, you’re small or you’re weak,
Know that your power lies in the strength you seek.
Rise from the ashes, let the fire ignite,
For you are the one who will always shine bright.
To the Boy I Once Was ©
By Prof.
David Sarikaya
I’ve seen your small hands trembling
in the dark,
Afraid the night would never let you
go.
You thought the world was written in
your scars,
That every wound would always
overflow.
But listen, child, the secret isn’t
pain,
It’s learning how to hold it and still rise
again.
Alhamdulillah… Alhamdulillah…
The softest strength is still
Alhamdulillah.
You will walk through rooms where
silence screams,
Where other people’s ghosts will try
to claim your name.
You’ll study broken minds and
shattered dreams,
And find the same old ache inside the
same.
But there’s a door no doctor ever
found,
It opens only when you choose the
ground.
Alhamdulillah… Alhamdulillah…
The self you seek is still
Alhamdulillah.
Don’t wait for someone else to make
you whole,
The power’s not outside, it never was.
You’ll write it down in books, you’ll
give it names,
You’ll call it therapy, resilience,
cause.
But all of it begins the day you see
The boy you are is already free.
Alhamdulillah… Alhamdulillah…
The quiet knowing is still
Alhamdulillah.
There will be nights when grief sits
at your table,
When love walks out and leaves the
door ajar.
You’ll learn that blame is just
another fable,
And mercy is the only lasting star.
So take the hand that reaches from within,
The one that says, “Begin again.
Begin.”
Alhamdulillah… Alhamdulillah…
The long way home is still
Alhamdulillah.
I’m fourty nine and still becoming
true.
I’ve held the broken, and I’ve been
the break.
If I could kneel beside the child of
you,
I’d only whisper this for mercy’s
sake:
You were enough before the world
arrived.
The journey was the proof you had
survived.
Alhamdulillah… Alhamdulillah…
The boy becomes the man becomes
Alhamdulillah.
Alhamdulillah… Alhamdulillah…
Until You Define It ©
By Prof. David Sarikaya
(An Anthem of Resilience and Strength)
A sound is no sound until you hear it,
A whisper in the wind, a voice you won't fear it.
A miracle is no miracle until you see,
The power within you, the strength to be free.
A song is no song until you sing it
loud,
A heart unafraid, standing tall and proud.
A self is no self until you define,
The truth in your soul, the spirit divine.
We rise, we fight, we claim what's
ours,
We own our light, we shine like stars.
A meaning is no meaning until you assign it,
A purpose is no purpose until you own it.
Together we grow, together we stand,
We’ll write our own story, with our own hands.
A fruit is no fruit until you've grown
it,
Roots in the soil, you water and hone it.
Love is no love until you give it,
In every gesture, every word, every minute.
Humanity is no humanity until we
unite,
Until we lift each other, until we fight the good fight.
Equality is the foundation, the heart of it all,
Together we rise, together we stand tall.
We rise, we fight, we claim what's
ours,
We own our light, we shine like stars.
A meaning is no meaning until you assign it,
A purpose is no purpose until you own it.
Together we grow, together we stand,
We’ll write our own story, with our own hands.
No dream is too distant, no hope too
small,
The power’s inside us, we answer the call.
From every struggle, from every fall,
We rise again, standing proud, standing tall.
We rise, we fight, we claim what's
ours,
We own our light, we shine like stars.
A meaning is no meaning until you assign it,
A purpose is no purpose until you own it.
Together we grow, together we stand,
We’ll write our own story, with our own hands.
A sound is no sound until you hear it,
A miracle is no miracle until you see it.
A self is no self until you define it,
Humanity is no humanity until we unite it.
Until we define it, we rise, we fight—
Until we own it, we’ll shine our light.
This song is available for purchase.
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